I didn't write this but it expresses pretty much how I feel.
God is trying to help me to see that He is in control. The thing is, that I *know* He is, I just don't *feel* like He is all the time. I know, too, that we are not to go by our feelings, but sometimes that is much easier said than done. I know the right answers, I really do, but sometimes they just seem like nice words on a page. Where is my faith? Why do I doubt? I am not sure I am really doubting, I guess it is more just wondering and waiting. Learning to trust God can be easy at times, and the hardest thing I have to do at other times. Sometimes I "get it" and other times I feel desperate. I know the answer to my own problem here, too. When I feel desperate, it is time to truly intercede before the Lord. Honestly at times I just don't feel like it. I have unmet desires and longings. I do know and trust that God has a purpose for my life. I want those desires and His purpose to be in total harmony. The thing is that maybe my desires are not His desires for my life. Perhaps He is still trying to mold me and teach me things that He wants me to know. I am sure He is desiring me to grow. I am still learning to trust God . . . One Day at a Time, and some of those days are more like . . . one minute at a time.