January 2011

Christmas was a fun time with my family We exchanged some gifts and enjoyed the day together. What would I do without my loving family. The best gift they could ever give me, is knowing they have a heart to serve the Lord. They truly are a blessing!

As we look to another year ahead of us, we have no idea what it will hold for us. But one thing is certain, whatever happens, we can be certain God is in control. I want to learn to trust him no matter what comes my way. Like our pastor said on Sunday, this year, let's make an effort to trust God in every situation. How do we respond when life throws us a curve? let's purpose in our hearts to trust him no matter how we perceive things to be.

May God bless you in this coming year!

Christmas 2010

Aah the joy of Christmas. But for some it can be a difficult time due to the loss of a loved one or a family member suffering with a fatal disease or some other tragic event. Let's not forget about those in those types of circumstances. Give freely, shower them with love and prayers, anything to make their situation easier to deal with. God promised never to leave or forsake us no matter what we face. You never know what an act of kindness or love can do for someone going through difficult times.

April of 2006,I was diagnosed with ALS. By Christmas I was in a wheelchair. That was devastating to realize I'll never walk again. After that Christmas, I didn't enjoy the holidays all that much. Five years later, I've come to accept my condition and realize that this is the plan God has for my life right now. I can say, this year I'm actually looking forward to the holidays surrounded by family and friends. God is good in every phase of my life. Most of all, I'm grateful that God cared enough about me to send his Son to die for my wretched self. After all, that is why we celebrate Christmas.

I remember when I worked in the mall, I soon discovered Christmas isn't that joyous for a lot of people. What I saw were folks scurrying about, stressed out, irritated, complaining about long lines, and fretting whether this person will be happy with their gift. I had never realized how the world had distorted the true meaning of Christmas until then. I wonder did they even enjoy the season after all that.
This year when you're enjoying the fun and festivities of the holidays, show some kindness to those less fortunate, pray for those who are hurting, and give out of love like our heavenly Father loved us.
God bless you all!

Thanksgiving 2010

Thanksgiving, what exactly comes to your mind when you think about this holiday? For some it may be preparing for that big turkey dinner. For others it is day spent with family and friends enjoying good food and fellowship. And for some it is the start of the shopping madness trying to be the first to take advantage of the deals and promotions the stores offer.

For me, this Thanksgiving I am grateful for another year God has granted me. I try to enjoy each day I'm given. I look forward to spending time with my family. I'm thankful for a day set aside to reflect on all the blessings we enjoy. I think of all the people in this world that don't experience the material things we take for granted and yet we yearn for more. There are people in countries that have nothing but yet they are happy and thankful for what they have because of their relationship with God. Their happiness isn't in material things. In the end they won't mean a thing but our relationship with God is eternal.
This year I am thankful for all the blessings I have despite this disease. I am thankful for my relationship with Jesus because without him I would not experience his grace and strength that sustains me in these hard times.
So this year, when you're enjoying you turkey, don't forget about those less fortunate than we are.

As stated in my previous post, I have been dealing with an infection around my feeding tube site. After two months it finally seems to be cleared up or at least under control. Thank you all for your prayers.
Not much has changed other than my overall strength has gotten weaker. I spend most of my time listening to music, sleeping or on the computer. Sunday evening we went to a concert in Philly to see Needtobreathe. It was a fun time with great music shared with friends and family. With the holidays fast approaching, it gives me something to look forward to. All in all God is good and has everything under control.

October 2010

This past month has been kind of hard for me. I've been dealing with an infection around the peg tube site. The antibiotics my doctor gave me helped clear it up but then it got worse again. the type of infection I have is very persistent and hard to get rid of. So I went to Hershey to see the doctor that put the tube in. She put me on stronger antibiotics which seemed to work until I started to react to them. Now I'm back on the ones I was taking before. The site looks better but not sure what the next step will be. I may have to have tube replaced which is something I don't really look forward to. I guess it could be worse.
On top of all that, I'm having a difficult time with my inability to enjoy food, communicate effectively, and generally everything I was able to do before. But one thing I'm thankful for are great caregivers who take care of me. I really appreciate my family and the love and support they provide for me. they always make sure to hang out and spend time with me.
I'm in a little bit of a funk right now but it will pass. God always comes through and provides the strength and grace to face each new challenge that we face. All things work together for the good to those that love the Lord. Joy comes in the morning.
Thank you for your continuing prayers.

Gordie's Day

For five years now Buck and Verna put together a fundraiser to help us with the costs associated with this disease. It consists of a motorcycle ride, bar-b-que chicken and baked goods, car show, and activities for the kids. Thanks to Doug Groff for bringing the fastest buggy in Lancaster County or possibly in the world giving rides to those brave enough to get in it. All in all it is a fun day. The weather was absolutely perfect! Emy and I sincerely appreciate everyone involved to make this day possible and the hard work that goes with it. Also, a special thanks to Charlie Pennel for making the bar-b-que chicken.
We really appreciate everyone's support and generosity. With your help we are able to cover our insurance deductible and other expenses not covered by insurance. Thank you all for caring and making this difficult journey a little easier for us. Know that you're loved and appreciated!

Seasons

With a slight chill in the air I know fall is fast approaching. While I do enjoy the beauty of fall, I don't really care for the long dreary days of the winter months. I guess that comes from all the years of working outside in all sorts of weather. Now that I'm no longer able to work, I don't mind winter as much.
Life is like the seasons, we go through different seasons in our journey of life. When I reflect back over my life and all I've been through and the different seasons I've experienced up to where I am now, sometimes the only thing I can think of is why Lord. There have been seasons of joy, despair, hope, satisfaction, contentment, and those periods of drought when I felt parched and thirsty, lost and confused, delusional from the scorching heat of the dessert, searching for the oasis I knew was out there somewhere. Just when it seemed everything was finally going the way I wanted it to, I was thrown another curve ball, the diagnosis of ALS.
In the last five years, I went from being a strong healthy self sufficient man to someone that has to rely on other people to do just about everything for me. While this certainly not the path I would have chosen for myself, it certainly has taught me many things about life. Am I angry at God? Not at all. God said all things work together for the good. I need to trust him with that. As a friend I met online used to say, "Dang ALS, but God is good" She recently went home to be with the Lord. Along with her, I'm declaring God is good!
Just as each passing day brings us closer to the end of the year, so it is with life. That day will come for everyone. Some are born and never experience a single day of life. Some lives will be cut short due to a tragic accident or disease. Whatever the case may be, we all live for a season.

Courtney & Jerry's Wedding

On 08/18/10 Courtney and Jerry got married. It was a beautiful day, beautiful setting, and a perfect day for a beautiful couple. Courtney is my neice and her husband Jerry hold a special place in my heart. To watch them grow in their walk with the Lord is very exciting for me. Their children are precious. My prayer for them is a long and happy life together and God's blessing in their lives. It was exciting to be able to share this special day with them. Love you both!

Clinic Visit

Yesterday I had my ALS clinic appointment which went fairly well. Not a lot of changes other than my speech is where no one can understand me anymore. My breathing function dropped from 83% to 61% this visit. The doctor didn't seem to worried about it at this point.

When I think back about five years ago when I began having my first symptoms, it's hard to describe all the emotions and the changes that took place. I had no idea how much my life would change. After all the crying, anger, depression, the why Lord, praying for healing, I slowly began to realize I will have to trust God with what he is trying to teach me and the plan he has for my life. This certainly isn't the path I would have chosen for me but we never know what God has for us.

Sometimes I feel like Job slowly being stripped of everything I have. But like Job, I will not lose my faith in him. My faith has been built on the rock and no storm is going to destroy that. I have my Christian parents and the values they have taught me to thank for that.

There are many questions I still have like why God allows sickness, why he chooses to heal some and not others. But no matter what, I know it will all make sense in the end.

Before all this I was living my life like most everyone else. I lived like I was invincible, never thinking my life could be cut short whether by disease, accident, or anything else. That only happens to other people. I guess what I'm trying to say is, looking back I would probably lived a little differently. We are all here for a season and our life isn't always about us. Jesus taught us to care for others by clothing the naked, feed the hungry, and shelter for the homeless. By doing these things we are doing them for him and showing them the love of Jesus. I'm not sure where I'm going with this other than we can get so caught up in our lives we lose sight of what God really wants for our lives.

Walk and Beach

First of all, I would like to thank everyone that participated in this years walk. Whether you walked, donated, or did both, you all helped make this year a success. Our team, Gordie's Groupies had 136 walkers and we came in second place for most money raised totaling nearly $17,000. I appreciate your support in helping to find a cure for this dreadful disease.

After the walk we packed up for our vacation to Ocean City, Md. It was a tiring day till we got there but we had an enjoyable week with our family. It was great to spend time together and enjoy each other. God has blessed me with a wonderful family. I appreciate their caring spirit and love.

2010 Harrisburg Walk to Defeat ALS

July 17th Is our annual walk for ALS. Funds are used to provide patient services and research to find a cure for this terrible disease. If you are interested in joining our team or make a donation, click on the link. Your support is appreciated.

http://www.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPLedge.asp?ievent=340726&supld=246879621

Legacy

Awhile back my Mom sold her house after she nearly passed away two years ago. She now lives with my sister and her family who graciously provided a place for her to stay. During that process, she decided to have an auction for her remaining possessions. The auction was held for us siblings and all the grandchildren. The auction was this past Saturday and the weather was perfect. What an enjoyable day with my family, which is something I cherish more and more in this journey.

As I was sitting there watching all the things being auctioned off, I thought about the significance of each item and the story behind some of my Mom's treasures. Photo albums, scrapbooks, books, cards, recipes, dishes, pictures, wall hangings, hand crafted items, and all sorts of personal belongings. Each item represented a part of the legacy she has created in one way or another. Every piece was part her life's story. I was thinking about the kind of legacy that will be left when I'm gone. What will the things I leave behind say about me? I hope it will be like the one my Mom left for me. So what do you want to be remembered for? All the things, possessions you accumulated, or what those things and possessions have to say about you and the legacy you created?

My ALS is about the same as the last month or so. I experience some days that are better than others, but through it all, God is good, all the time!

Memorial Day, Picnics, and Family

Memorial day,a day set aside to honor those who gave their lives and served our country so we can enjoy the freedoms we have in this country. There is so much we take for granted. On this day many family and friends have back yard bar-b-ques and picnics. Sunday I spent time with my family to celebrate my sisters birthday and Monday we had a family picnic with my wife's family. These days, spending time with family and friends means so much more to me than ever before. The love and support they provide is something I cherish. We had a good time together watching all the little ones play, eating, and visiting until the thunderstorms rolled in. I enjoyed it even though I wasn't able to eat and speak. It is very hard to talk and most don't can no longer understand me. I have my eyegaze speaking device but I'm just not ready to give in to using it yet. It does have it's limitations which is another reason I'm not real excited about it. But in time I'll adapt to it just like I did with all the other devices I depend on.

Through it all, God is good!

Wow, May is almost gone and time just seems to slip by quite rapidly. As I reflect back to all that has happened since the beginning of the year, I'm reminded once again how important it is to make every moment count in everything we do. When I was at home while growing up, there was a plaque hanging on the wall that said,"Only one life will soon be past, only what's done for Christ will last." It never really struck me how true this is until I was diagnosed with ALS. Looking back, there's so much more I could have done for Christ, storing up treasures in heaven. But what's past, there's nothing about it we can change. What we do have is the present and each day we are given from here on out. Since ALS, I have learned more about things like trust, faith, doubt, humility, contentment, hope and so much more than ever before. I hope by writing this blog, I can somehow help someone how to live for God in the midst of what may seem like a hopeless situation. Job lost everything but he refused to blame God. In the end, God restored everything he lost and more. In the end, God will restore me with so much more than I could ever imagine. I'm counting on it!